Mother’s Day

MOTHER’S DAY
DR. JIM DIXON
MAY 12, 2013
EXODUS 20:12, EPHESIANS 6:1-3

The Statue of Liberty stands today on a 12-acre island in New York Harbor. That island is called Liberty Island. The Statue of Liberty rises 301 feet, one inch from the base of the pedestal to the tip of the flame. It is a gift from the nation of France, expressing friendship and a common love for freedom and for liberty. The gift was given on July 4th in 1884. The statue was sculpted by Frédéric Auguste Bartholdi, and it is made out of copper. Bartholdi chose for the face of Lady Liberty the face of his mother, Charlotte. It is her face that is portrayed on Lady Liberty.

The strange thing is that he was estranged from his mother. They were not close. His mother had raised him in an oppressive way and with frequent anger. She was a bigot, and she was guilty of antisemitism. She hated Jewish people, and Frédéric had married a Jewish woman. From that point on, his mother would have nothing to do with him. And yet he said he wanted to honor his mother, as the Bible commands us. He wanted to honor his mother. So, the Bible does command us honor your mother and your father. It doesn’t say honor your mother and your father if they’re wonderful. It just says, honor them. So we look today at what it means to honor moms, and have two teachings.

The first is, honor your mother in her lifetime. While she still lives, honor her. A few years ago, Barb and I traveled to Washington DC to go to the National Prayer Breakfast. And while we were there in Washington DC we went to the National Gallery of Art. We saw a lot of masterpieces, some of them worth hundreds of thousands of dollars, some of them worth even millions of dollars. We saw one painting by James Whistler, and it was valuable, but not as valuable as a greater painting by James Whistler that is not in the National Gallery of Art. The most famous painting by James Whistler was that painting oftentimes called Whistler’s Mother: Arrangement in Gray and Black, No. 1. It’s a portrait of the author’s mother. And you’ve seen that picture before. It’s one of the most famous paintings in the world.

Of course, you might think, well, wow, James Whistler must have really loved his mother. And that would not be true. He was not close to his mother at all. In fact, the only way he honored her at all was by painting that picture. And I suppose you could say that, in a sense, he has honored her in death as the picture remains. But in life, he did not honor her. He was not there for her. When she was widowed and lonely, he never even bothered to visit her, and when she was old and frail he was not there to comfort her. He was not there to love her. No, it was not James Whistler who loved his mother. It was his brother, William Whistler. William Whistler loved his mother. William Whistler was a wonderful Christian. He loved Jesus Christ, as did his mother. His mother loved Christ. James Whistler was a rebel all of his life.

William Whistler was a man who sought to walk with Christ. He was a medical doctor, an MD. And when his mother was widowed, it was William who took her in, in the midst of her loneliness, and brought her to his home in London. Later, when he moved to Philadelphia, he brought her to his home in Philadelphia where he loved her as a son. And when she was old and frail, he took care of her. In his love for her, he honored her.

I know that in this room most of us whose mothers still live want to show them honor now while they live. My mom and dad have passed away from this world. They have gone to heaven, and they are with Christ. Barb’s mom and dad have also gone to be with the Lord. They are with Christ. And we look back now wishing they were still alive. I’d love to talk to my mom and dad. I know Barb feels the same about her parents. We ask ourselves, did we do all that we could while they were here? I used to tease my dad some. My brothers and I would sometimes tease my mom and dad, but we loved them so much. We called my dad “the wallet.” My dad loved to pay for things. I mean, whenever we went out to eat lunch or dinner, my dad would always insist that he pay. He loved to be generous. He was a great provider. And we called him “the wallet.” Whenever we’d go out to dinner, we’d say, “Mom, join us for dinner. Bring the wallet with you.” And my dad would always smile big. I mean, he loved to be called
“the wallet.”

But my mom and dad were equally generous. I mean, the money was their money together. They were, as a married couple, truly one in every way. And they were one financially. So the money was theirs together. They were both equally generous. But we never called mom “the purse.” I mean, we never said, “Dad, join us for dinner and bring the purse with you.” I don’t think my mother would’ve really appreciated that. And I think my dad even would’ve been disappointed, since he kind of thought of himself as the provider. But we did love my mom and dad so much and we love their memory now and look forward to seeing them in heaven.

My mom had a very great servant’s heart, a deep love for Jesus, and it was contagious. My mom lived almost till she was 95, and she drove her car till she was 90. I remember we would fly into Hollywood, Burbank Airport, and she’d pick us up and she’d drive 80 miles an hour on the highway back to her house. It was a good thing she let that go when she was 90. And at 90, my brothers and I brought my mom out here. My dad passed away when he was 82. He died of a stroke. My mother, when she was 90, we brought out here because she wanted to live in a community. And we brought her to the Johnson Center, which is a Christian center that has various levels of care. She lived in the independent living where she could enjoy life. She just loved all the friends that she made there. And God blessed her there. Barb and I went to visit mom every week, and we went to visit Barb’s parents too.

Barb’s parents we also brought out from California when they were older because they needed care. Barb’s mother had rheumatoid arthritis. She had come down with rheumatoid arthritis when she was in her twenties. She lived till she was 80. But as she got older, her hands were so gnarled and really so misformed that she could hardly hold anything or take care of herself. Barb’s dad had a stroke when he was 60, a very serious stroke. He lived till he was 90. So the last 30 years he was paralyzed on half of his body and could not speak well. But we brought them out to the Johnson Center so we would visit them also.

Each week, we’d bring them coffee. My mother just loved Starbucks coffee. I kinda like it myself. And of course, we would take my mom and Barb’s mom out to breakfast on Saturday morning. And they loved, for some reason, going to the Village Inn. And we would take them to Village Inn and get whatever they wanted. But we ask ourselves now, did we do enough? I mean, did we really honor our moms and show the love that we should have? I’m sure you ask yourself the same question. And we all want to be faithful.

I know that I want to be faithful to Barb. I know that Barb is not just a great wife to me, but an amazing mom to our kids. And when the kids were real little and really couldn’t honor her on Mother’s Day, I would try to make sure I honored her. I still do in some sense. But we would obviously go out to lunch as we are going to do today. But I would buy her roses, and sometimes through the years maybe some jewelry. Of course, I’ve often wondered whether I honor Barb enough. And I know I don’t help enough around the house. Barb assures me that when I retire, I will. So I believe that. But when I think of Barb, I think of Matthew 20 and I think of Mark chapter 10, where we have the story of the mother of James and John, who came up to Jesus and really begged Jesus that her sons might be exalted. She asked that when Jesus came into His kingdom and into His glory, that one of her sons would have the authority of His right hand, the other, the authority of His left.

And Jesus said to this mom, “You’re misunderstanding My kingdom. You’re misunderstanding the kingdom of God. In the world amongst the nations, people love to Lord it over others. They love to exercise their authority over people. Not so in My kingdom. In My kingdom, if you would be greatest, you must be the servant of everyone, even as I came not to be served, but rather to serve and to give My life as a ransom for many.”

I think of Barb when I think of servant heartedness. Someone who is great, Jesus said, is someone who is servant hearted. And I tell you, Barb is great because she is so servant hearted and the phone is often ringing and people know she’s servant hearted. And so people ask, “Would you do this? Would you do that?” She’s constantly on task, because She is so a wonderfully servant hearted.

I know that is true of many of you in this worship service today. You are servant hearted, too, many of you moms. And I know that being a mom is sometimes incredibly hard. And when the kids are still in the nest and when they’re very young, it’s exhausting. I know even the best of moms, no matter how much you love your kids, sometimes it’s only mid-morning and you’re asking the question, “How am I going to make it to the end of the day?” You’re just longing to put your kids down and put them to sleep, that you might have a moment’s peace. God bless you, and we want to honor you not only today but every day of your life.

I want to say, secondly and finally, a little bit about honoring our moms in death—not just in life, but honoring our moms in death. We have memorial gardens out here to the north. I’m sure you’re aware of that. You’ve noticed that really they’re part of the chapel grounds and an extension of our chapel, the Memorial Gardens. And it’s a wonderful place. It’s going to get more beautiful here as we approach the summer and we can plant the trees and the flowers and make the gardens what they’re meant to be. Barb and I have already reserved a niche in the Memorial Gardens for our physical remains. As soul and spirit we go to heaven, but we commit our bodies to the earth, dust to dust. We’ve reserved a niche there. My brother Greg and his wife, Barb, have done the same. My brother Gary and his wife, Ann, have done the same. It’ll be a beautiful place, and we seek to honor our loved ones there. And they will have memorial services. We will have memorial services there seeking to honor our loved ones there. We have a cloister that’s part of the chapel. It’s that long aisle that’s covered. And in the cloister, we have a section where you can reserve a plaque to honor a loved one as well. It’s a wonderful thing to honor our loved ones in a setting where Christ is honored. What a wonderful, wonderful ministry our memorial gardens are.

And yet, I say to you I’m sure that if you would really honor your mom in death, it’s really not about a memorial garden. It’s about your heart. It’s about your mind. It’s how you choose to remember her. If you would honor your father in death, or your mother, it’s how you choose to remember your parents. And you have a choice. Now, we’re all flawed. There are no perfect moms in this room or anywhere on the earth. There are no perfect dads in this world. All of us have sinned and we’re in desperate need of grace. But how you choose to remember your parents is so, so important.

I don’t know how many of you have been to Ethiopia, and my guess is very few. I know I’ve never been there. Our daughter, Heather and her husband, Chris, have traveled to Ethiopia and to Addis Ababa in conjunction with the adoption of a child. And many of you know that this is the adoption process that never quite seems to end. It’s been 13 months so far, but the end is in site. We’re confident that Elijah Aubush will be coming home to be with Heather and Chris and with the family. In about another month, they’ll be going back to Addis Ababa for that purpose.

In Ethiopia, there is a legend about the mother of their nation. This legend is widely held throughout Ethiopia, amongst all the people. And many of the people are Muslim. Some of the people, a lot of the people, are Christians. But this legend is held about the mother of their country. And who do you think the old Ethiopians believe is the mother of their country? You see, the people of Ethiopia believe that the mother of their country is the queen of Sheba. Did you know that? They believe that the Queen of Sheba is the mother of their country, and they believe that 950 years before the birth of Christ the Queen of Sheba journeyed from Sheba to Israel to meet with the King of Israel, King Solomon, son of David, in all of his wisdom and in all of his glory.

The Bible confirms that much. The Bible says, yes, that is true. The Queen of Sheba did indeed travel to Israel to meet with Solomon, son of David, and she beheld his wisdom and glory. But according to the Ethiopians, the Queen of Sheba went on to marry Solomon and they had a son named Menelik. And from that son, Menelik, came the nation of Ethiopia, the people of Ethiopia, and the royal line of Ethiopia. It’s strange enough, I know.

Many of you have heard of Rastafarianism. Rastafarianism is really a Caribbean religion, not an Ethiopian religion, but it’s a religion that is cultic. It’s a cultic apostate religion that has this weird reverence for Ethiopia. The word Rastafarian comes from an Ethiopian word meaning “prince,” and Rastafarianis, which I know most of you associate with dreadlocks and reggae game music, venerate the line of Haile Selassie, believing that it goes back to the Queen of Sheba, Solomon, David, and that it includes the line of Christ.

So they give this veneration and worship to the royal line of Ethiopia. And Rastafarianism is all based, strangely enough, on the legends of Ethiopia regarding the mother of their country. Now, historians tell us those legends in Ethiopia aren’t true. Historians don’t doubt that the Queen of Sheba visited Solomon, but he did not marry her. They had no offspring. They had no child named Menelik. There was no royal line, no nation birthed from Solomon or the Queen of Sheba. It’s all made up. They literally contrived the mother of their country. They made it up. It’s not true. And they wanted her to be great. They wanted the mother of their country to be unbelievable. They wanted her to be special. And you can kind of understand that.

Now, when God asked us to honor our mom and to honor our dad in death, when He asks us to choose how we remember them, it doesn’t mean He wants us to contrive a phony mom. He doesn’t want us like little children to say, “My mother and father are better than your mother and father.” He wants us to be realistic. He wants us to be honest. He wants us to understand their flaws, but He also wants us to forgive. He wants us to release. He wants us to let go of grievances. And that’s why in 1 Corinthians chapter 13, the Bible says, “Love doesn’t keep a record of wrongs.” You have to choose to love. You have to choose to not keep a record of wrongs if you would honor your mother in death. And that’s why in 1 Peter chapter four it says, “Love covers a multitude of sins.” You have to choose, again, to love. You have to choose to let love cover a multitude of sins.

So this is what God wants, that we would choose to honor our moms and dads in death. I know most of you had moms that deserve honor. There is not a lot to forgive, not a lot of sins to cover. But I want you also to understand that God’s Word tells us that we’re to honor them all. And I would suggest to you that moms deserve honor just for bringing us into the world and just for giving us life. They deserve honor.

Some years ago, Barb and I had two toy poodles, which were two too many. One was named Sprinter and the other was named Misty. They were just pups when we got them, and we were told we could wait a while before we had Sprinter fixed because He was too young to impregnate Misty. So we bring the little toy poodles home, and it is not that long before I’m coming around the corner and I see the two of them making puppy love. And they looked so embarrassed. I mean, they just looked so shy and so embarrassed.

Well, after the natural length of time, Misty gave birth to three puppies. And if two’s company and three is a crowd, this was a kennel. But I watched as Misty was pregnant. She had no discomfort. I mean, it was business as usual every day, just totally playful. She didn’t seem to even notice her pregnancy. And when she gave birth again, there was no whimpering, no whining, and no crying. There didn’t seem to be any pain at all. The pups just popped out.

Then she started licking them, and pretty soon they’re running around. I’m thinking, wow, human beings aren’t like this. It’s not this way for us. You look at Genesis chapter three, where the Bible says of women that you bring forth children in pain. And how true that is. That nine months prior to giving birth is not always easy, either.

I know that Barb, during that nine months, had morning sickness all day long. She had morning sickness morning, noon, and evening, probably for about five months. It seemed like daily, wherever we drove, she’d say, stop the car. And she’d just open the door and throw up. And that’s just part of bringing life into this world. It’s just part of what it means to be a mom.

And in seventh, eighth, and ninth, months, many moms just feel so big and so uncomfortable they’re just longing to get it over. But then you give birth. And we went through Lamaze classes, but Barb wound up having a C-section. But after 20 hours of labor, she had an emergency C-section. And it was all so much pain. And I just say to you, I submit to you that even if your mom gave you up for adoption, honor her just for giving you life and bringing her into this world and having the courage to do that and to give you life and to bring you into this world.

So we want to honor all of our moms today. And I think what God is saying to us is to show mercy. I think so many moms have shown mercy to their kids. I think some people just don’t understand the mercy of a mom. In December 4th, 1976, the president of the Central African Republic, a man named Jean-Bedel Bokassa declared himself the emperor of the nation. And he changed the name of his nation to the Central African Empire. Three years later, in 1979, he was cast down and the Central African empire went back to being the Central African Republic as it is today. And it borders on Cameroon and Chad and the Sudan. And I think if you’re familiar with Africa, you’ve heard of this country.

But this man, Bokassa, in my opinion, should have been cast down eight years earlier, in 1971, when on Mother’s Day he decreed that anyone who had ever committed a crime against his or her mother would be executed throughout the whole country to honor moms. Anyone who had ever committed a crime against his or her mother would be killed. And clearly he didn’t understand, as mothers rose up, historians tell us, up all over the Central African Republic. Because They didn’t want to see their kids executed. They didn’t care what they had done, even what they had done to them. Mothers don’t want to see their kids dishonored in life or in death. And they want to believe the best about them. And that’s why Al Capone’s mom, when asked what do you think of your son said, Al’s a good boy. It’s a lot of mercy.

But I think God wants us to flip that around and, if needed, show mercy to moms and dads. And it’s a choice. It’s a choice that God wants you to make, that you would honor your moms not only in life but you would honor them in death and you would choose to remember them in a way that honors them. And we’re left with a promise from God. If we would do this, if we would honor our moms in life and honor them in death, we have a promise from God. This is pretty special. I mean, you can go back to Exodus chapter 20 or Deuteronomy chapter five, and you see the Decalogue there and the words of God to the nation of Israel. And the original promise was given to the nation of Israel. “Honor your mother and father that you might live long in the land, which the Lord your God has given you.” So it’s a promise to Israel that if as a nation they honor their parents, they will dwell in the Promised land for a long time because God would bless them that way. If they would, generation after generation, honor their parents, God would secure them in the land.

But now the interesting thing is, you come to the book of Ephesians, the sixth chapter, the Apostle Paul broadens the application and he broadens the promise. He’s talking to people in the church in Ephesus. Some of them are Jewish, most of them are Gentile. But Paul understands that the 10 commandments are at the very heart of the moral law. And Paul understands the moral law is for all people of all nations, for all time. Paul understands this. It’s not like the ceremonial law or the Levitical dietary laws which were given by God to specific people for a specific time. No, the moral law is given for all people, at all times, in all nations. And so Paul takes the promise and he broadens its application to all people. If you would honor your parents in life and in death, God will bless you. You will live long on the earth. He’ll bless you in a variety of ways, because the blessing is in His hand. But He will bless you.

That’s a cool thing. It’s a wonderful promise. So today, I know your mom deserves honor, and I know if you are a mom, you deserve honor. But even moms who maybe don’t deserve so much honor are to be honored by the will of God. Honor them in life, honor them in death, and a promise is given. Let’s look to the Lord with a word of prayer.